Awakened - Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Christmas neared once again, and for the first time, in over a year, Samara was able to touch, pick up, and put away some of her children’s things.  Some of the items she donated to the Salvation Army.  Tears were a continual thing with Samara.  Her eyes were always bloodshot, and red.  Working with the school children helped occupy her mind, and encouraged her in a way, that nothing else had; she was able to mask and hide her emotions amongst the business and constant chatter.  

This year, the school had taken a two and half week break for the Christmas Holiday.  She felt this was as good a time as any to face her demons, and get things done. 

While sitting on the floor of her son’s room picking up and boxing away Legos, Samara's mind began to wonder.  "Mama, mama," she heard her son say, "Look at this!  What do you think it is?"  Samara looked up from what she was doing, and was startled by the appearance sitting on the floor in front of her holding a Lego structure.  Sitting amidst the rainbow of legos her son looked back at her; blue eyes glowing, and a happy smile spread across his face. "Well?"

Samara heard rapping and turned to look in the direction of the door.  When she looked back, he was gone.  She slowly raised herself from the floor, and walked her aching body to the front door.  

After the accident, the doctor said she would heal, but probably experience some stiffening of the joints.  What an understatement.  She had been broken up pretty good.  Pins and metal brackets held her together during her recovery.  She had to have reconstructive surgery on her face.  Some of her joints were now synthetic and pig skin graphts replaced what had been torn away in the accident.  To someone who didn't know, they’d say she looked pretty much the same.  But to Samara, and her friends, the scars, were still visible.  Stiffness set in when sitting far too long, and in this case, hours on the floor picking up Legos, and remembering her son, Samuel.

Samuel had bright blue eyes and dark blonde hair.  His smile warmed her heart, and his hugs touched her soul.  Samara was overjoyed to find out her second child was a boy.  She remembered the doctor looking at the ultrasound, and saying, “I’m not certain, but I think it’s a boy.”  She and Dereck were elated.  

Their first child was a chunky, pink bundle with beautiful bright, curly red hair.  The red hair came as a surprise to both of them.  They named her Maddie after Samara's great-grandmother.  The name suited her.  From day one, Maddie was magnificent, and well mannered; later displaying traits of an exceptionally kind child.  She loved to read, write, and was significantly brighter than other children her age.  She excelled in everything she did, and her parents were very proud.

Bell, sweet little Bell.  What a surprise.  Four years after Samuel was born and Samara became pregnant with her third child.  She nor Dereck had been trying, or expecting another child for their future.  Bell was spoiled by all the family, her dark brown eyes and locks curled and tangled themselves into everyone's heart.  Tenderhearted as she was, Bell was a bold, and extremely happy, loving child.

Samara reached the door to find her beautiful redheaded friend April standing there.  April was speckled with golden freckles which somehow from a distance, resembled a golden tan.  Her eyes were spectacular, large and doe eyed brown and her hair a sunburned auburn, kinky curly, and naturally highlighted with strands of gold.  Her lips were full; some might say babydoll luscious, and she had a smile that would brighten the room.  As usual, April was dressed to the nine.  Even when running the track, April looked like a high fashion fitness model.  No matter what she did, she was always tastefully dressed, and well put together. 

“Hey, Sammy Poo!”  Samara loved the nickname April had affectionately given her sometime over the years.  As usual, she was vibrant and full of energy.  “Hey girl.  I thought I’d come by and help you get some stuff done.  Hope that’s OK?”

Samara smiled.  She was so happy to see her beautiful friend standing there, and welcomed her right in!  “I would love it!  Come on in!”

Awakened - Chapter 6

Chapter 6

After returning home from swimming, and singing around the campfire, Samara took a long hot shower to remove the sand and stickiness from her skin.  She became sweaty after several rounds of volleyball with her friends.  Several missed attempts left her face down in the sand, and with scrapes on both knees.  She was thankful April had called; the distraction had done her good.  

The shower was refreshing, and the warm water gave her tanned skin a radiant glow.  While sitting in the living room she and her roommate Melanie shared, she heard someone knocking.  Samara put the book she was reading on the end table and glanced over at the clock.  "Wonder who could be here at this hour?". 

She peeped out the front window but could see nothing but darkness.  "Who is it?".  No answer.  Holding her breath, Samara opened the door to find Derek standing there with a dozen roses, and a huge grin on his face.  In shock, stunned, paralyzed with excitement, she stood unable to move, or speak.

He laughed at what must have been the most preposterous look he’d ever seen.  “You gonna make me stand here all night, or are ya gonna let me in?”

Samara blinked, thinking she was dreaming, “Yes.”  

“Yes, I can come in, or yes, you’re gonna let me stand here all night?”  His deep chuckle caused something to stir inside her.

“Oh my God, yes… yessss...” Samara leaped towards him, hugging and kissing his sweet face.  “I can’t believe you’re here!  Come in!  COME IN!” 

Derek pulled Samara close with his free arm, and kissed her passionately on her inviting, full lips, “I love you Samara, I couldn't stay away!”

Derek and Samara dated only a few months before she found out she was pregnant with their first child.  Shortly after finding out about her pregnancy, they were married.  They’d had three children in all, built a new home and shared many wonderful memories.  Derek had taken a local job as a supervisor and Samara quit the engineering firm to take a position as a paraprofessional at the local school.  She did everything in her power to be a wonderful mother and wife. She wanted to be accessible to those whom completed her.  Derek became deacon and Samara rededicated her life to Christ, helping out in their church volunteering and offering their time in as many ways as possible.  Their love for God and family showed in everything they did.  They knew that even though things didn't start out the way they probably should have, they did everything in their power to ensure God was the focus of their life.

The November before the accident had been their ten year wedding anniversary.  As always, instead of taking time to spend that special day together, they spent it doing something as a family.  They worked really hard to ensure their children knew how much they were loved, and to maintain a wonderful, happy, fulfilling life together.

Now it seemed, all that hard work was no longer needed, and she was lost with not knowing what to do.  Her her heart felt empty and her life felt meaningless.   Here she sat, on the edge of the bed, a year after that dreadful accident stole her family, her life, and hollowed her heart.  Everything she did, and lived for was gone.  Emptiness consumed her life without having those she loved to fill it.  Words could not describe the tightness in her chest and how breathlessness suffocated any emotions she had.  A lump formed in her throat, and Samara swallowed hard to keep from crying; screaming.

She beat her fists against the edge of the bed.  "Why God, why did you take my family from me?".  Guilt washed over Samara as she remembered the Biblical story of Job and how he had remained faithful to God after losing everything.  At the same time, anger washed over her and she wanted to curse Him.  She just wanted to understand why God let this happen.  What wrong doing had cause such a curse to befall her?  

Awakened - Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Each time the phone rang, Samara silently prayed it was Derek.  Weeks passed, and she had not heard a word.  Several times, she attempted to call him, but thought better of it and returned the handset to the cradle.  With all modern inventions and social media, there was no reason why they couldn’t connect.  Derek was a unique sort of country boy.  He didn’t believe in Facebook, Myspace and other social media.  He outright said, “It’s for sissies!  No real man uses Facebook!  If you want to talk to someone, pick up a phone!”  Well, she was waiting; no calls.   Samara felt he obviously did not want to talk to her.

Samara was doing her usual dam run, preparing for the yearly 5k race her hometown held; The Hartwell Dam Run.  She always kept her cell phone attached to her hip, for emergency purposes.  There were many tourists in the area, and not knowing who was who, or why they were there, Samara decided to play it safe.  There had been rumors of flashers, and the sort, but Samara had never come across any of them.  She had been running across the Hartwell Dam for many years, and never had encountered anyone remotely suspicious. 

It was getting late.  As she headed back across the dam, towards her car, Samara’s phone rang, startling her.  “Hello?”

“Hey, Sammy Poo.  It’s April!  We’re having a cookout on the lake, and I was wondering if you’d like to come.   David’s going to be there with his guitar, and Melanie!  I thought I might bring my nieces and nephew, and a few other friends are supposed to come!  We’re cooking hotdogs, hamburgers and ribs.  Some of the guys are bringing fishing poles, and well… whatcha think?”

When April said “a few” friends, she usually meant twenty or so.  Samara wasn’t really in the mood for entertaining, or being entertained, but she knew she needed to occupy her mind with some sort of normalcy. For her, being around a crowd of friends was normal.   “Sure, I think that would be nice!  I’m running the dam,” She said panting, “and need to take a shower first. Whew…” she breathed in and exhaled saying, “What time, where and what should I bring?”

“YOURSELF Girlie!” April exclaimed.  “And, maybe a bag of chips, a drink, and a covered dish!”  April laughed, knowing she was being silly.  “We’re down at Stone Creek Cove!  Bring your swimsuit!  It’ll be fun.”

“Alright!” Samara slowed her pace as she reached her car.  “Be there in a bit!”  She tucked her phone in the console, and drove home. 

Her house was a mess, or at least it was to her standard.  She knew she was depressed when she gave into watching television over doing something productive.  Samara’s job as an engineer kept her busy; working long hours, and taking many trips out of town.  Samara wasn’t use to the mess.  Maybe it was the thought of doing something fun that ignited a fire, she quickly began straightening the house, wiping down dusty furniture, and putting away folded laundry.  By the time she reached the bathroom, she was in dire need of a shower.  She quickly removed her tennis shoes, running shorts, bra, and underwear.  A quick glimpse in the mirror told her she’d been neglecting herself.  Bags formed around her eyes, and poor eating caused her lower abdomen to puff out.  She glanced over at an Oxygen Magazine, and quietly said to herself, “Yeah, I know, I know… it’ll get better!  I’ll be back in the groove, in no time!”

Samara had made up her mind, to put Derek behind her and move on.  It was what it was.  She was going to hang out with some good friends, and have some fun.  No more sadness, no more depression, no more regrets.  Her biggest regret had been ending her relationship with Walter.  She thought she loved him; he was comfortable. 

Awakened - Chapter 4

He kept his word, and called Samara minutes after she and Melanie entered their house.  

Melanie gave Samara a crosswords glance.  With that one look, Samara knew what she was thinking.

Melanie often threw caution to the wind when it came to men, and she knew from experience, this whole fiasco could turn out very dreadful.  Melanie tossed up her hand and headed to bed.  It had been a long night, meeting those three men, the dancing, and the wine, all taking its toll.  “Night Samara!  Don’t forget to lock the door!”

While Derek was in town working, they’d managed to meet several times a week.  Samara wasn't sure where the relationship would lead; knowing Derek was in town on business for only a short while.  He would soon be leaving; as the job was completed.  Guilt and shame filled Samara’s heart.  She loved Walter, but deep down inside she knew it would never be more than it was.  She knew she’d be constantly waiting on a proposal that would never come. 

Derek lit a fire in Samara's heart that she'd never felt with Walter.  He held and loved her the way she desired to be loved.  Samara's heart raced each time she looked into his deep, dark eyes; her blood boiled with each touch.  Samara knew the love she felt for Derek, in the short time she knew him, was real.  How could she do this; how would she ever face Walter again?

When Walter returned from his hunting trip, Samara met him at his home to tell him it was over.  She tried to break it to him easy, but no matter what she said, or how she tried to say it, Walter became angry, then distraught.  Samara hurt for him, knowing she was the cause of his pain; his sorrow.  She wanted to reach out to him. Each time she tried to touch him, he pulled away.  He finally turned away from her, "Leave Samara, just leave.".  Without saying another word, she walked out of his home, and his life.

Derek returned home to Valdosta, Georgia within a month of their meeting.  Samara felt certain his promises of calling and writing would be short lived.  After a few weeks of not seeing him, her heart ached.  Samara had a difficult time admitting and convincing herself what she and Derek shared was more than just a fling.  She was certain she’d never see or hear from him again.  She longed for his touch, his embrace; yet tried to forget the passion she felt for him.  The nights they’d spent swimming in the warm waters of Lake Hartwell, making love on the shoreline in a remote, secluded cove or curled up in her bed holding one another, giving themselves heart, body and soul, replayed over and over in her head.  She pushed the memories out of her mind; or at least she tried.  She missed him, and needed him.  She was in love. 

Two weeks had passed since she’d last seen him.  And, although she had Derek’s number, she hesitated calling him.  She wanted Derek to be the one reaching out to her.  She was testing his feelings towards her.  She prayed it would be much more than a month long fling.  Samara prayed the feelings Derek had for her were as strong as the feelings she had for him. She prayed he loved her, as she loved him.

Awakened - Chapter 3

“Hey!” he said as bold grin spread across his face.  His accent was deep, down to earth, more like that of a farmer, or backwoods country boy.  “Do ya’ll mind if me and my friends sit with you?  We looked around, and there ain't no more tables available.” 

Samara wanted to say, “YES”, and “NO” all at the same time.  All she could do was look at him.  She quickly glanced at her two single friends; they were all smiles.  “No, we don’t mind.”  She replied quickly, knowing if she hesitated, she might think better of it, and decline.  The two men standing beside him were equally handsome, in their own way.

All three sat down, and there was a brief silence.  It was obvious things were a bit awkward.  Being the bold, outgoing lady, as usual, Melanie was first to speak.  “Well, where are you guys from?”  She was looking directly at the man sitting beside her.

“Valdosta.  We’re here on business.  We run a construction company.  Well…," there was a slight pause, "We just started it a few months back.  Do you know the new History and Natural Science Museum being built on the other side of town?  Well, that's us.”  

The music began to play and one of the other men, a tall muscular blonde,  raised his voice to match the volume, “That’s why we’re dressed like this.  We weren't expecting to go out, but we've been here a month.  We were getting kinda stir crazy.  We thought we might try one of the local dance halls.  Turns out, this is the only one in town!”  

Melanie smiled in agreement.  It was obvious she was smitten.

“I see…,” Melanie placed her hand on her chest,  “My name’s Melanie,” pointing to the beautiful redhead across from her, “this is April,” she paused and looked toward Samara, “and this is Samara.” 

All three of the men smiled and spoke simultaneously, “Nice to meet you!  I’m Robby,” said the muscular blonde.

“I’m Chris...” Smiled a medium built, clean shaven man with outrageously thick dark hair, “and this is my partner, Derek”. 

Derek smiled. 

“Derek… Derek”, Samara liked the sound of his name.  She looked towards him, batted her long thick lashes and smiled a beautiful toothy grin.  Her heart was racing, and she prayed he could not read the thoughts playing out in her mind.  “What a piece of eye candy... GIRL, get a hold of yourself now… you’re with Walter, you shouldn't even be looking at another man!  Shame on you!!!”   Samara quickly flipped hair off her shoulder, as if trying to flip an arguing angel off her shoulder and into oblivion.  The music suddenly changed to a Kid Rock song, Only God Knows Why.  For some reason, she felt the music suited the occasion.

“Would you like to dance,” Derek rose from his seat extending a hand toward Samara.

Samara was ashamed of the way she was feeling.  A quick glance at her two friends said more than words could have expressed; confusion, interest, lust, heat, passion… confusion, shame, WALTER...guilt…confusion...Walter.  Her mind said, "NO!", but her mouth said,  “Sure!”

The song had a slow steady beat, and the rhythm was mesmerizing.  Derek wrapped his strong muscular arm around Samara’s waist and pulled her closer.  She could feel his taught muscles through their clothing, and heat flooded her cheeks.  Her flesh burned with excitement.  She was almost a head shorter than he; his mass, and height left her breathless.   He smelled of fresh cut lumber; a woodsy clean odor that tantalized her nostrils.  She wanted to breathe in every inch of him.  As the music played, Samara felt suspended above the floor.  His grip was tight, strong, and inviting. 

Throughout the night there were several more dances, reverberating discussions over likes, dislikes, various construction jobs the men had been involved with and comparing muscle mass.  When the D.J. announced it was closing time, the three men walked the ladies to the dimly lit parking area.  They politely waited while Samara attempted to unlock the car door with a failing key-less remote.  Derek stood close as Samara manually unlocked the door to her Lexus.  His face was so close; his warm breath was felt against her cheek and he whispered,  “Do you mind if I give you a call?” 

Samara was uncertain.  She was still thinking of Walter, yet her mischievous heart made her mouth open to say, “I’d love that.”  She quickly retrieved a business card from the clutch she was carrying. 

Derek looked down at the card, “You’re an engineer?  Wow!  Smart lady, huh?  Well…”  He sighed.

“I hope to hear from you.”  Samara opened the door of her Lexus sedan, and slid gracefully into the leather seat.  Looking up at Derek, she smiled.

“OH, You will.” Derek smiled back as he gently closed the door. 

Awakened - Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The alarm sounded and Samara slapped it off.  She looked at the time, “6:30 am!” 

She rolled herself to the side of the bed, and hesitantly proceeded to get up.  Her bedroom suit was a Christmas gift from her husband and hap-hazardly placed as it was the day he surprised her with it.  She remembered they had disagreed over furniture placement, and ultimately decided to wait until after Christmas to find it a permanent, suitable location within their enormous bedroom.  There was no rhyme or reason for its placement, none at all.  The furniture was precisely where the movers had left it the day it was delivered; Christmas Eve, a year ago. 

After the accident, Samara had not been physically, or emotionally capable of changing anything within her home.  Her children’s rooms were just as they were the morning they made the last minute decision to head to her father’s as a surprise holiday visit.   Their clothes had not been washed, Christmas toys still in the middle of the floor as her children left them, expecting immediately to return playing with them.  The tree was still in the same corner of the room, wrapping paper scattered about the floor, and decorations untouched.  How had she managed a year; leaving things the way they were was a surprise to not only her, but to friends and family as well.

Several times Samara’s friend April had offered to come over and help clean the place up.  Samara declined the offer, stating she was not ready to tackle the mess, and needed more time.   April would just look at her in agreement.  

April and Samara had been friends for twenty years.  Although they couldn't remember how they met, they knew they'd made and instantaneous connection.  Out of all her family and friends, April was her best friend, a wonderful counselor, supporter and confidant.

Samara sat on the edge of the bed, eyes tightly shut thinking, “Derek, oh Derek… how I wish you were still here.  I need you, I need you so much.”  Her mind took her back to the moment she and Derek met.

While she, and her two best friends, April and Melanie were out to celebrating her thirtieth birthday, Samara hadn’t planned on meeting anyone .  They were out for dinner and dancing at a fine restaurant in a nearby town.  After dinner, they made their way down to the dance hall and sat at a round table, near the dance floor.  After sitting quietly, and scoping the room for a few minutes, Samara noticed a tall ruggedly handsome man dressed in a white t-shirt, faded, torn, and obviously well worn denims with a pair of colored work boots leaning against the bar.  His hair was dark and wavy, and his arms and body were muscular and lean.  When he looked her way she wanted to overt her eyes, but she didn’t.  He had dark eyes, and well tanned skin.  His mouth was full and luscious and surround by several days growth of shadowy, neatly groomed whiskers. He looked mysterious; the strong and silent type. 

Samara was seriously involved with a wonderful, kind man named Walter, yet this astounding creature standing before her made her heart beat, erratically.  Walter and Samara had a wonderful relationship, and had dated for close to seven years.  She patiently waited as he traveled from one hunting adventure to the next, hoping one day he’d have the desire to settle down and ask her to marry.  While Walter was out on a duck hunt, Samara’s friends Melanie and April suggested they celebrate her upcoming birthday in style.  She couldn’t believe she was turning thirty.  More over, Samara couldn’t believe she was still unwed and without children.  If asked, she quickly agreed her biological clock was ticking; ticking fast.

Maybe it was the virility of the man standing before her that had her so bothered; the sheer maleness of his thick muscular legs, arms, and torso.  The idea of him being the father of her children quickly entered and exited her mind.  Embarrassed by the thought she turned away.  It didn't stop her from wondering if he was single, and found herself inconspicuously looking at his ring finger; nothing there.  Her mouth watered, and she became nervous as he and several of his friends made their way to her table.

Although Samara was turning thirty, she was still asked for identification when entering clubs, and ordering drinks.   Most people thought she was in her early to mid twenties.  She had a beautiful round face, full lips, baby doll nose, long, curly blonde hair, and big, beautiful deep blue-green eyes shielded with long, thick lashes.  Her eyebrows framed her eyes beautifully, and her smile was broad and full of straight, beautifully squared teeth.  Samara had been running and working out for years.  She found the best way to live a healthy life was to make a healthy life the only way of life.  She enjoyed eating healthy, running and exercise and the affect it had on her outward appearance.  Her vigorous way of life contributed to her youthful appearance, healthy glow and beautiful shape.

When he came closer, Samara could see dark hairs peeping out the top of his shirt. The idea of seeing him topless and thought of his broad chest covered in dark hair caused her cheeks to flush.   How masculine.

Awakened - Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Samara rolled over and hung her long slender legs over the edge of the bed.  Pain shot through her hip as she tried to stand.  Reaching for the nightstand, Samara steadied herself making her way to the bathroom.  The air was cool, and she could tell without looking that it was still early.  The night covered the sky, and darkness filled her home.

She staggered towards the bathroom, holding onto the bed rails and furniture to prevent putting weight on her injured leg.  Limping into the bathroom, flipping on the light, Samara stood solemnly in front of the bathroom sink.  Gazing at the mirror, she noticed her drooping right eye, and the scar extending the length of her brow.  Cupping the scar with her hand, she remembered the cosmetic surgeon telling her the scars would heal, and be almost unnoticeable in no time.  But for now, looking at her reflection brought forth painful memories, and the agonizing realization of what had happened.

She balanced herself on her uninjured leg, as the memories flooded her mind causing her to feel faint, dizzy.  She reached and grabbed the edge of the sink as reality sank in.  Samara’s heart began to race rapidly, and a huge lump formed in her throat. 

Samara’s world began to spin, and the floor was vanishing beneath her.  She lost her grasp, stumbled, and fell onto the cold, tiled bathroom floor.  Her mind went dark, then light again.  Sobbing, Samara felt a scream escape her.  A moment of silence, then she heard the screams of her family, the screeching sound of tires, and metal on metal! The shear memory of the accident had overwhelmed her, and taken possession of her emotions.  “Why,  OH, GOD…. Why….!!!!”  She was there, at the scene of the accident once again.  This time, instead of being trapped inside the vehicle, she was standing there watching as the emergency workers diligently worked to free her and her family from their crushed Four Door Ford F150.  That truck… her husband loved it.  What was once an eye-catching, waxed and polished white four door truck, with chromed rims and tinted windows, was now a crumbled, unrecognizable mound of metal and shattered glass. 

Samara could see emergency workers opening the vehicle with jaws-of-life, and paramedics working vigorously to resuscitate her husband.  His long muscular body was stretched out on the ground.  She could see that his once white t-shirt was covered with blood, and his strong legs now looked crumpled, and awkward.  Where once had been a mass of beautiful dark hair, looked like an inflamed balloon of flesh.  Her husband’s eyes were swollen shut, and blood poured from his nostrils and mouth.  Samara sobbed, and reached her arms desperately toward him, only to grasp air; nothingness.  Suddenly, it dawned on her;  where are the children?  She looked frantically around the tangled mess of cars.  Lights from the ambulance and emergency vehicles were bouncing off broken glass, and jagged metal.  She was becoming frantic, and confused.  Once again, everything receded into darkness.

When Samara came to, daylight spilled through the windows.  Her cheek ached from where it had collided with the bathroom floor.  As she forced her body from the cold, damp tile, Samara checked her reflection in the mirror.  Her face streaked with tears; she forgot what she had come in there to do.  Now swollen, her cheek forced her eye closed, and now her left eye matched the droopiness of the right.  Samara grabbed the bottle of pain killers; she shakily popped two in her mouth, and threw back a cup of water.  Carefully she made her way back to bed.  Sleep, she only wanted to sleep; to go back to a place of happier times.